Do you have a close friend or two who talk only of themselves? Does the statement “Enough about me, let’s talk about me.” ring any bells?
There are one or two pals of mine who have a habit of talking only of themselves and their adventures. I can hear crickets when I attempt to share anything personal. Sure I’ve caught myself blathering on a little too much about myself from time to time, but I try to listen to others with an open heart…even if it is killing me.
I don’t see the point in pointing it out either. Some people will never change and if they do, it isn’t going to be because I said something profound. (Let me know if I do say anything profound.)
We are living in such self-absorbed times it is mind-boggling to me. Television is mind-boggling to me. We are living in a time where everything is permissible and if you disagree, you are a prude. Bad behavior is rewarded, manners out the door, morals an evil concept. Everything is a shade of grey.
(On a side note, if people are going to protest the wealthy class, capitalism, etc, why are they ignoring professional athletes, actors and musicians? People who burn $100 dollar bills should be shunned, not admired. Excessive spending and lack of respect for money should be pointed out as a deadly sin – not admired. But we are free society and if we make our money honestly then we should be able to spend it how we like. If there is no one around to admire the disrespect, perhaps it would end the behavior? We can’t make an example of the corporate fat cats only; those celebrity types are part and parcel. You just don’t know which corporation.)
I’ve made a few enemies lately because I have drawn a boundary line – one that used to be the norm. Since we are a society of spoiled children, my boundary seems extreme. The people who understand what I am talking about, stand next to me, stand up for me and have no trouble with the idea that not everything is okay.
I’ve made a few new friends too and that is always a joy. But making 4 new friends means only one will remain. It is quality I want, not quantity. Excuse the cliche – it is apt.
One new friend is a very creative person and a bit wild, but that doesn’t bother me. Wild, artistic people can be quite grounded if you look and listen carefully. But this particular person (I’ve noticed) speaks only of himself. He never asks questions, he only makes statements and if he does ask a question, it is usually about himself. This is a turnoff, turn around, turn about, return to sender, point of no return.
Another dear friend reminded me recently that I may still attract narcissists but I am much better (and faster) at recognizing them, and this should be a point in my favor. Yes, it terrifies me how I attract these people but acknowledging them for who they are, blessing them and running like hell is a good thing.
There are people in my life that will be there forever; be they friends or family. I accept the good, bad and revolting…but that doesn’t mean I have to spend a great deal of time with them.
As I’ve stated before, I’m a slow learner. Not everyone is going to like me, some are going to hate me – and that is okay.