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I don’t know why I thought I would suffer less from allergies once Summer arrived. Somewhere in my demented state I began to think of the seasons as rooms. Okay, I’ve walked through Spring and am going to open the door to Summer, firmly shutting that annoying season behind me. Hello Summer! Yay hot weather, burned grass, dead flowers…uh oh, dead flowers.

Yes, dead flowers can give you an itchy face too. And I think (no scientific fact) that pine trees bloom in the Summer. Did you know that those lovely trees have wicked pollen that flies like a feather on the wind? Straight up your nose.

I’ve been steadily doped up on Benadryl for a solid week. If I even see a drawing of a Star Gazer Lily, I go postal. Within minutes or even seconds of sharing a space with one of those stupid (yes, the are dumb and conceited) flowers (depending on the size of the room) my breathing apparatus shuts down, my forehead begins to itch, eyes water and the sickly scent of the lily wafts around me, taunting me like a quiet, unseen evil. Again I think of Stephen King.

Upon looking at some recent posts (recent but not frequent) I recognized how grouchy I sound. Yes, a few unfortunate things happened to me but I usually attack misfortune with humor…but not when constantly high on allergy meds.

As I said in the past (last Spring), I usually like the occasional Benadryl and don’t mind the lethargy that comes with it. If I take anything else my limbs jerk about when in a resting position. Now that can’t be good. So I stick with what I know works. But again I notice that when on this drug I do less, I see fewer people, I’m grouchy, tired and disinterested in life. What a drag! I can’t come up with names, I forget postures in yoga that I’ve done for 7 years and the world seems dull. I didn’t even watch Atlantis land! Okay it was at like 3 or 4 in the morning here but still, I didn’t watch the video footage!

No bueno.

There isn’t much I can do for this ailment but wait out the season and look forward to opening the door to Autumn. Jumping in the ocean helps a bit but as soon as I’m near one of those awful flowers (you know the ones) I’m toast. And they are EVERYWHERE! Did you know we aren’t allowed to have incense in our yoga studio because people find it offensive and don’t want to inhale smoke? Well guess what? I don’t want to inhale the poisonous Lily fumes so why the hell do they have bouquets of them on the front desk? Why?

So excuse my lack of adjectives, verbs and proper sentence structure. I’m stoned.

I think I will make meatballs today with a lovely tomato sauce. Oh that’s right, my body (it has a mind of its own)  recently decided to be allergic to tomatoes. Fuck it.

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